There is a misconception in our popular culture that a man is always ready for sex and a woman isn’t. For any man or woman who feels this is the truth, this article will clear up the misunderstanding and may help restore balance.

A man engaging in sex with a woman is like a man playing a musical instrument. Saying a man is always ready for sex and a woman isn’t is like saying the violinist is always ready to play and the violin isn’t. Men and women are equally ready, they just express it differently.

A man can have sex with any woman and give her female orgasms any time he wants when he follows these steps.

1. Make sure she’s in tune

• A woman’s arousal starts in her brain. If that brain is occupied by pressing worries or problems, there is no room for thoughts of sex. If she is angry or hurt, she can’t be turned on until these feelings subside. These feelings could be about her lover or something completely outside.
• Therefore, a man who is trying to seduce her must first: address whatever is currently on her mind. And second, facilitate it getting resolved or put on the shelf. For example: “I can see that you’re mad at me because I forgot to take out the trash again.” Then listen to what she says. Then say, “I’m sorry that I made you feel this way. I have a solution. I’ll put a reminder alarm on my cell phone so I’ll never forget again.” Problem solved. Now there’s room for sex.
• This may seem like it has nothing to do with sex and like it is a lot of hard work. It can also look like a prodigy violinist is wasting time tuning his instrument. Why doesn’t he just play already? Because the instrument isn’t ready yet and has to be tuned.

2. Learn where the notes are

• Each woman’s sexual organ is slightly different, just like each musical instrument is different. If you want to play, you have to learn where the notes are. What does she like? If you touch her there, how does she feel? There? If you press hard on this string does it sound beautiful or ugly? If the touch is soft, is the music tantalizing or annoyingly too quiet?
• The fastest way to “learn the notes” is to ask her what she likes, then fill in the gaps by doing your own experimenting and asking her how it feels each step of the way.

3. Practice.

• Even the most virtuoso musician with the finest instrument will practice for hours each day. Practice happens in stages
• Reviewing and memorizing the places and ways of touching to produce the best effect. You can visualize yourself doing it when your woman is not nearby, go over in your mind what those good spots were and think of more to try.
• Repeat. Each time you engage in sex, concentrate on using the touches and moves and techniques that you know she likes. At the beginning, it may be a lot of work, but eventually, your fingers will fly to those places without even thinking – just the same way as with a musical instrument you’ve mastered.

4. Invite the muse

• At this point in the career of a musician, as in the life of an excellent lover, there has been many hours, months, even years of practice and he has nearly reached mastery. To go from good to excellent involves creativity, sensitive interpretation, and even the involvement of spirit.
• After the master lover has become an expert of the notes and strings and buttons of his lady’s sexual body, it is time for him to use that body to express himself: conjure his deepest feelings and show them in a masterpiece of touches on her body. It may involve doing new things, crazy things – and it will be amazing.

5. Tend to the instrument

• After a musician has finished playing, he goes through processes to take care of his instrument: adding oil, loosening now strings, changing strings, disassembling, carefully packing, etc. It would be easier and faster for him if he didn’t do these things, but he does because he knows it will make his instrument last longer and continue to produce beautiful music.
• It is the same way between lovers. How men and women act toward each other in everyday situations that are in no way sexual is in fact a part of the sex. To have great sex, lovers should be kind to each other when they are not having sex.

Any musician knows that there are no short cuts. We also know that the journey is part of the pleasure so there is no need for shortcuts. A man seeking to have sex with a woman does have an advantage over the musician: his instrument can talk to him, show him, and of course, give him the same pleasure and attention in return. You become a female orgasm master if you think of it as playing a musical instrument.

Men’s Health magazine conducted a survey getting answers from thousands of women regarding sex. What women want in bed? What are their insecurities? What to women want from men?

While a lot of men worry whether they come too soon, that was only a huge concern for 22 percent of women. Interestingly, when women were asked for their top complaint, 22 percent said “more oral, please.”

Next to premature ejaculation, men’s biggest fear is that their penis is too small (as per 17.6 percent of men who listed it as their number-one insecurity), followed closely by how long it takes to achieve another erection after sex (15.4 percent) and being unsure if she reaches orgasm (14.6 percent).

But turns out  what women want in bed is something else. Their biggest complaint is not enough foreplay. No big surprise here! In addition 19 percent say, “He doesn’t know how to touch me,” and 26 percent complain of “the same moves, every time.”

While the stereotype goes that men want sex more than women, the survey points out that 34 percent of women say “I wish we’d do it more.” In other words, not getting enough is the top complaint of roughly a third of everyone who responded, and more women than men had this complaint.

4 key learnings from this survey on what women want in bed:

1. Make feedback sexy, not strained
Improving your sex life comes through candid discussion. The change can come from in-the-throes encouragement rather than pointing out flaws. Show how you’d like to be touched by grazing his or her body gently with your fingers rather than grabbing. Moaning, increased urgency, and verbal enthusiasm will let your partner know what turns you on, while gentle redirection with hand or body position will show what doesn’t.

2. Prolong foreplay
Foreplay should be a progression, not a sprint. Watching a sexy/romantic movie together, flirting over a romantic dinner, whispering sexy remarks in the midst of a crowded party, or cooking breakfast together can all be a prelude to more connected sex. Slow-burning foreplay isn’t only better for you: Longer foreplay helps men synchronize with their partners, giving them better control over ejaculation.

3. Get the timing right
Most couples fall into a rut of having sex at bedtime, but the workweek is the worst time for rock-the-firmament lovemaking. In a separate survey, 64 percent of men said that exhaustion, stress, and packed schedules are the three biggest sex blockers, and women cite being “too tired” as their number one turn-off. So switch up your regular schedule: Order dinner in after a stressful day and canoodle while you wait, or indulge a lazy Saturday morning in bed - times when you’re both stress-free, well-rested, and better able to focus on one another.

4. Foster a feeling of emotional closeness

A third of men and almost 50% of women say that feeling emotionally connected is the most important part of mind-blowing sex. Open your eyes and savor the moment. Pause to breathe and establish eye contact between kisses, be aware of every touch and caress, and be open in conveying your pleasure. The more secure you both feel, the less guarded sex will become.

Do you agree?

Get all the details here.

How to make a women orgasm every time? The odds are against you. A known fact - about 3/4 women don’t orgasm regularly during sex. There are many things to do about it (a lot of answers in the previous posts in this blog), and one way is to do something to a woman that feels so incredibly good that she completely relaxes and lets go, you’re highly likely to make that woman orgasm.

This is a list of techniques that are almost guaranteed to make a women orgasm every time.

The Double Grip
A woman’s butt is often left without attention during sex. And that’s why grabbing both of her cheeks when she’s on top may be just the unexpected turn-on a girl needs to get off. The buttocks are packed with nerve endings and to give her maximum pleasure, spread your fingers wide and squeeze both buttocks firmly.

The Up Shift
When a guy is on top of you in the missionary position, have him shift his body slightly forward so that, every time he thrusts, his penis rubs against your clitoris (and pubic bones rub together). This tactic is even more orgasmic if the woman’s legs are together and the man’s are straddling her. This increases clitoral stimulation. You can achieve the same effect when she’s on top by propping yourself up on your elbows, which places your abdomen in closer contact with her clitoris and surrounding areas (for indirect stimulation).

The Ultimate
There’s no question that clitoral contact is the ultimate way to make a woman orgasm. How and how much exactly depends on the woman.

Going down on a woman allows you to get a real sense of the stimulation she likes at every stage of arousal, especially the final one. It also eliminates any performance anxiety she has during intercourse, so she can relax and enjoy.

Learn what she likes. Get between her legs and give her a solid base of lips and tongue. Use your hands to guide her hips to let her know you want her to do the grinding. When she takes over, note how hard she’s pushing and in what direction. Use that information later when using your fingers or giving her a more aggressive tongue bath. Avoid direct contact with clitoris as it is too sensitive, but be very close to it.

The Drop Trick
Steady clitoral contact is essential to female orgasm. But without adequate lubrication, it can become uncomfortable. Lubrication increases the comfort and speed with which you can penetrate the vagina and grind against the clitoris. Sometimes women can have trouble getting wet even though they are aroused.

Try a couple of drops of lube on the end of your penis. Then thrust with short, rhythmic strokes while pressing your body against her pubic mound.

The Neck Warmer
Our necks are highly responsive when touched as the skin is thin, and the blood vessels are close to the surface. Kissing a woman’ neck can remind some of their first sexual experiences which could make it even more exciting. Remember - no hickeys.

When you’re having sex and she’s clearly moving toward orgasm, brush your lips from her collarbone to her jaw, then give her neck big, warm kisses until she comes unhinged.

The Play-by-Play
For a verbal girl a string of four-letter words whispered in the heat of the moment can work wonders. Start by complimenting her or talking about how good what you’re doing feels. If she doesn’t say anything back, she might not be into it. If she responds with “Oh, yeah” or a similarly enthusiastic phrase, she wants more.

Some women get really turned on when told what you’re doing to them in explicit language. Be careful with your choice of words though. While some women like to talk dirty, some get really turned off by it. If she ever seems taken aback by what you said, just say “Sorry about that, I got carried away.”

The Dream Machine
Some women can orgasm only by using a vibrator. If your partner never orgasms no matter what you try, simply ask her if she’s ever had a battery-assisted orgasm. If she says no, introduce her to a whole new world of wow by ordering something small but powerful, such as the Aqua Touch Vibe.

If she’s over the age of 30, her answer will probably be yes, and she’ll be more than happy to pull her Hitachi Magic Wand out of her bedside drawer. After asking what pressure and speed she prefers, all you have to do is hold it against her clitoris as you move from one position to another. Be ready for the miracles happen.

Use these techniques and you never have to ask “how to make a woman orgasm” again.

Interested to know what a woman feels when she reaches orgasm? This is a step-by-step coverage of what happens to women on their way to orgasm.

1. She becomes aroused

Sexual triggers like hot moves on the dance floor, passionate kisses unleash a cascade of physiological responses that begin to prepare her body for sex. Her body starts to lubricate the vaginal canal and inner labia. Chemicals released in the brain increases bloodflow to the pelvic area, swelling the inner and outer labia and causing her to feel sexual tension.

2. Her body unwinds

Parts of her brain start to relax, and the uterus tips upward, making the vagina longer. The clitoris starts to swell, as does the spongy tissue around the urethra, which is why some women feel as if they have to pee when aroused. Indirect stimulation of the clitoris will make her want direct stimulation, increasing her appetite for sex.

3. Her vital signs increase

Her heart rate and breathing speed up, more blood is pumped to her sexual organs, and her clitoris extends, fully engorged, longing for contact with penis. Slow, steady stimulation that builds rhythmically will help coax her body toward the threshold to climax. The more anticipation she feels, the better she’ll respond.

4. She nears her treshold

Because of the flood of neuro-transmitters in her brain, she enters a trance-like state. Just before the orgasm, the subconscious part of the brain signals a vaginal nerve to start muscular contractions. Women may feel the outer third of their vagina “grabbing” at the penis, but her arousal may fade and she will still revert to stage 1 if stimulation ceases or changes.

6. She reaches orgasm

The orgasmic stage with rhythmic or sporadic contractions in the vagina, uterus, and anus typically lasts 10 to 60 seconds. At this point, many women prefer more intense stimulation that matches their orgasmic response. The chemical oxytocin is released in the brain, promoting a feeling of closeness, according to some research - which could explain why women want to cuddle after sex.

7. Her rest period begins

Unlike men, women can have multiple orgasms without experiencing a refractory period after each one. This doesn’t happen without stimulation though, so if stimulation stops women will return to a base-line level of arousal. Contractions stop, the uterus lowers, and the clitoris goes back in its shell. Heart rate and breathing slow, and bloodflow returns to normal. The clitoris will probably be too sensitive for direct stimulation, but other parts of her body will be yearning for attention.

Sure you’ve heard about multiple female orgasms, but as many as up to 70% of women have never experienced multiple orgasms. Multiple female orgasms are real, and achievable for most women who are interested in experiencing them.

Female multiple orgasms really do exist. In order to understand why, you have to understand the sexual response cycle. After men orgasm they go through a period where they are incapable of having another orgasm (lasting anywhere from minutes to days depending on the age). Women don’t have this challenge with sexual response cycle. Therefore, a woman can reach orgasm again after the first.

As to why most women don’t experience multiple orgasms is the same reason why women don’t get orgasms in the first place: lack of clitoral stimulation. Once the first orgasm is reached, the clitoris becomes very sensitive, so continued stimulation should be very light or indirect.

After the first orgasm a woman can slip slightly away from orgasm. Deep breathing and relaxation will help restore her to the brink of orgasm. Of course some women simply don’t enjoy stimulation continued beyond the first orgasm. If this is the case there’s no reason to continue.

Women who experience multiple orgasms regularly have a these things in common:

• They tend to be women who have examined their own genitalia and are familiar with their equipment
• They are comfortable with their sexuality
• They tend to masturbate frequently and engage in frequent sexual fantasies.
• They are more likely to have open and honest sexual discussions with their respective partners.

If you want to start experiencing multiple orgasm, make sure these 4 points are covered (and that your clitoris gets stimulated!).